So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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