Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
