I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
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I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
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Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.