didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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