i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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