I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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