How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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