I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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