The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
We need to get me chipped asap
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