at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
