Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize