OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize