too bad you live with your parents still
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I didn't notice because vodka
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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