Whod you bang
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We're using joints as your birthday candles
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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