porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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