also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize