Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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