Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
