I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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