Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
