How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
