I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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