Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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