Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket. http://tfl.nu/3z5u
  Replies (31) Good night (672) Bad night (2277) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue. http://tfl.nu/njsp
  Replies (20) Good night (3829) Bad night (659) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  The brown eye won't let me do that either.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): The brown eye won't let me do that either. http://tfl.nu/x635
  Replies (2) Good night (442) Bad night (2427) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole http://tfl.nu/otvq
  Replies (434) Good night (54926) Bad night (6420) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her. http://tfl.nu/npv7
  Replies (6) Good night (948) Bad night (2874) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE http://tfl.nu/5phb
  Replies (184) Good night (51572) Bad night (2262)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't. http://tfl.nu/8pi1
  Replies (15) Good night (2761) Bad night (1842) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again. http://tfl.nu/4ycr
  Replies (10) Good night (2821) Bad night (1008) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): 5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now http://tfl.nu/dpww
  Replies (18) Good night (2116) Bad night (1668) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well.. http://tfl.nu/jvza
  Replies (8) Good night (961) Bad night (1901) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night http://tfl.nu/8aub
  Replies (6) Good night (2766) Bad night (573) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress? http://tfl.nu/gpyt
  Replies (9) Good night (1581) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away. http://tfl.nu/e1yg
  Replies (9) Good night (2195) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that http://tfl.nu/k4ts
  Replies (6) Good night (1138) Bad night (413) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime.. http://tfl.nu/op0p
  Replies (2) Good night (755) Bad night (167) Order T-Shirt

Randomize