I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Randomize
