i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
