Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
