dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
why do cheetos always look like penises
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
