People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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