So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
