DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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