New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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