You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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