wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
