So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
