at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
