i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I think my moral compass just broke
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