You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
