I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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