what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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