Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Enjoy the penises
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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