apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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