well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
