just tell him i said nine months
Sober January is a disaster.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
