whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize