Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
