Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
