i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
