so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
