hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I want to make a zoo with you.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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