"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I am one with the molecules
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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